Our Goal is to create Resolution Without War
We resolve family conflict without war
By focusing on nurturing the family’s well being, yours, the children’s and your spouse’s, we shift family conflict to healthy resolution. Stopping the fighting stops the injury to children and stops the pain for you. We act quickly to stop the pain. If you can follow our lead, we can do that for you. We use many tools.
We prevent the emotional and financial injury common to legal separation and litigated divorce by helping you gain, understand and use power to care for yourself, your children, your extended family and your spouse. Yes, this can even be done when the dispute has begin as a hateful and vindictive conflict. It can still be resolved without warfare.
Stopping the fighting stops the pain to you and stops the injury to your children. If you can follow my lead, we can stop the pain and resolve its cause.
How Can You Separate Fairly and Safely into two Households Without Injuring Each Other and the Children?
Consultation. We can advise you on the “community standard of fairness” as it applies to your case and coach you in negotiating and resolving your own case. If you don’t mind the risk and feel you can minimize it by communicating and seeking fairness openly, this is the least expensive way to fully resolve a family dispute.
Quick Resolution. There is a ten day to two week window from the divorce decision to conflict. If you can get to us immediately upon recognizing that a divorce decision has been made, often we can resolve everything within days with minimum expense and optimum fairness. After about ten days to two weeks of a divorce decision being made, people begin telling friends and family, get sympathy partly in the form of blame and begin to feel a public position of righteousness, of having been wronged and needing to punish. It will be six months and thousands of dollars before they begin to be able to reason fairly again. By acting quickly, we can help you avoid that six month’s of fighting.
Informal Collaboration. We work with opposing parties and opposing attorneys to resolve conflict. We communicate, share factual information, share expert witnesses. All of this saves expenses and shortens the time and expense of resolving the conflict. We understand the “community standard of fairness” set by the laws and judges. By accepting it, we can usually resolve a case if we can meet with everyone.
Formal Collaboration. We have been specially trained along with many other attorneys to work in a Formal Collaborative process. In that process, we contract with opposing attorneys and opposing parties to not use the court or trial until we have resolved everything. That assures the expense and trauma of trial will be avoided. If you are interested in Formal Collaboration, you must let us know at the start, so that we can assist your opposing party in finding another trained Collaborative attorney to represent them. See the list of Collaborative Attorneys. See Collaborative Contract to review a commonly used agreement.
Negotiations. By disclosing documents and sharing information fully we inspire trust and enable frank discussion. This allows working together to resolve the conflict without trial. The truth of what will best care for everyone now gives a foundation for resolution in every method of resolution we use. By accepting the “community standard of fairness”, we can usually resolve a case with the opposing attorney.
Judicial Settlement Conference. Sometimes meeting with a judge to review the case prior to trial helps to resolve lack of cooperation, confusion in the law or how it applies to the facts in this case or to help bring an attorney or an opposing party to reasonableness.
Trial. When a fair resolution cannot be reached, we get a judge’s help in getting fairness for you in trial. Trial is a truth disclosing process. The judge’s job is to use the trial to discover truth and base the decision upon it. Helping the judge discover the truth is the purpose of trial. That is our purpose is serving you.
Custody and Parenting Issues
We shift family conflict to healthy resolution by focusing on nurturing the family’s well being, yours, the children’s and your spouse’s. Stopping the fighting stops the injury to children and stops the pain for you. We act quickly to stop the pain. If you can follow our lead, we can stop the pain and resolve its cause.
Options for Legal Help
Skilled mediation is the best conflict resolution system, because a high skilled mediator can help resolve the emotions driving the conflict, the story holding the conflict and the logistics to keep you both safe in separate households. Litigation can only do the latter. We help you when mediation doesn’t seem safe enough for you. For the most highly skilled and complete mediation services, visit our Mediation section.
We use many tools – Consultation, Quick Resolution, Informal Collaboration – meeting with the opposing party and their attorney, Formal Collaboration – contractually agreeing to resolve everything without trial, Negotiations, Judicial Settlement Conference, and, as a last resort, Trial. For a description of these tools see Resolution Without Trial.
In Safety and Protection you will find how to protect your physical and legal safety. For your emotional safety see Stopping the Pain.
Our Custody and Parenting page gives basic information. If custody is likely to be contested, you should immediately schedule an initial consultation just to educate yourself in the complexities of custody. A plan can help you avoid litigation over custody. See Consumer Guide to review it.
About Steven Allen Smith, Attorney at Law
Both attorney and mediator, Steven Allen Smith uses many different tools with you and your partner, including consultation, informal collaboration and quick resolution. Your case may require meeting with the opposing party and their attorney for formal collaboration– contractually agreeing to resolve everything without trial. Other times, a situation may require negotiations, Judicial Settlement Conference, and, as a last resort, trial.
Even in those cases when trial is necessary, it IS possible to accomplish trial without warfare.